That crazy, crazy lady

October 28, 2010 · 13 comments

in Birthdays (everyone else's), Embarrassing, Family, Feeling Sorry for Myself

Today is my mother’s birthday. I love her tons but she is one weird person. If you have ever met her you know what I am talking about.

Look how normal she seems in this picture! (Let’s gloss over my pre-teen ugliness.) But she is wearing a wig (she came from the generation that wore wigs as an everyday accessory). That wig is part of a story.

Back when I was in 6th grade I decided to have a slumber party. All my friends came over and we set up our sleeping bags in the living room and proceeded to giggle for about five straight hours. We were just about to play “light as a feather, stiff as a board” when out of nowhere came some very loud music. Very loud Middle Eastern Music.

Oh no. OhNoOhNoOhNo.

She can’t be.

But she was.

Mom was smack dab in the middle of her Belly Dance phase. (Or should I say, Eirol Savid was in the middle of her Belly Dance phase. Eirol Savid–Mom’s real name backwards–was her belly dance name.) And here, right in her very own house, was a captive audience! (The woman loves an audience.) How could she possibly resist?

I don’t know whether my mom started belly dancing for fun or exercise or just because she is drawn to sexy things, but she was full-on absorbed. She had the whole get-up: the bra covered with coins, finger cymbals, scarves, metal chains and baubles hanging all over the place. And the wig. Eirol Savid does not have a frumpy, short mom-perm; that’s Lorie’s hairdo. Eirol has long lustrous curls.

But by the time a woman is forty-ish and has a frightening c-section scar or two, she has no business being seen in a chain-mail bikini. So Eirol decided to wear the entire get-up over a bright, shiny red unitard.

A unitard.

Eirol came whirling out into the middle of the slumber party waving her veils and scarves and chiming away with her little cymbals. She put her whole heart into her impromptu performance for the collection of open-mouthed girls in their Hollie Hobbie pajamas.

At least I think that’s what happened.

I spent the next half hour curled up in the fetal position deep in my sleeping bag wishing my real parents would come and get me.

______________________________

Never a dull moment with my mother. And whether that’s a good thing or not depends on if you are her child.

But we all love you Mom! Have a great birthday!

{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Charlie October 28, 2010 at 5:07 pm

HA HA HA HA HA.

Oh Lorie. So much fun.

ALSO. In that picture, you look like India and Arianne looks like Daphne. CRAZY.

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Tiffster October 28, 2010 at 6:18 pm

I love your mom.

I'm also really glad that didn't happen to me.

But I would liked to have been there.

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Heather October 28, 2010 at 7:27 pm

Ha! That is a hilarious story and very well-told. Happy birthday to your mom.

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L. October 28, 2010 at 9:12 pm

The funny thing about that is, I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER DOING THAT!!! Although I sure wouldn't put it past myself.

I confess, I am weird, Weird, WEIRD! But not usually boring. And thanks for remembering me on my birthday.

Love you! (And aren't you glad I'm on medication now? Not much to worry about anymore except creeping Alzheimer's!)

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Selene October 28, 2010 at 9:33 pm

Ha! My mom did belly dancing too! Must have been the 70's. Never in front of a crowd though.

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Lonna October 28, 2010 at 9:40 pm

Brilliant! That post made my day. I needed a really good laugh. I remember having lots of sleepovers but I confess not many sightings of parents and none that were memorable like that. Thank goodness for moms that give us stories to tell and laugh about later in life. I hope she has a great birthday.

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Stephanie October 29, 2010 at 12:04 am

This post makes me happy. Lorie is most definitely a one of a kind!

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Lisa October 29, 2010 at 12:13 am

That is a laugh out loud story. Happy Birthday to your Mom! :)

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Lorie October 29, 2010 at 1:11 am

That sounds like a meeting formerly known as Enrichment activity if you ask me!!

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Mindi October 29, 2010 at 2:10 am

i've always enjoyed stories about your mother. good times.

yes, i still read!

those cookies were to DIE FOR.

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tiburon October 29, 2010 at 2:26 pm

Your mom is a kick in the pants. And I am now reconsidering the belly dancing class…

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Omgirl November 3, 2010 at 1:18 am

I guess I was exhiled from being anywhere near that party because I don't remember that at all. Or else I've blocked it out, which is also a strong possability.

I do, however, remember when she came out and belly danced for our seminary class. Good times.

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Charlotte November 3, 2010 at 5:44 pm

That is hilarious! I would love to meet your mom, I think.

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