Texas

It’s been so sad to hear about all the tornados in Oklahoma and Texas. Growing up in Michigan, which is part of the Midwest, we had tornadoes pretty often. We were thoroughly familiar with tornado drills and hiding in the basement. I remember tornado warnings to be more of a pain than actually being scary; you know how kids are, never believing that bad things will ever happen to them. My nightmares, though, often featured tornadoes. They still do occasionally.

We have tornadoes from time to time here in Central Texas. Nothing like northeastern Texas, though, which is flatter and wetter. We have some tornadoes brewing today, though. Golfball-sized hail too. Naturally there’s hail forecasted; we just had a bunch of our roof fixed due to a windstorm. Still, there’s not nearly the risk of something happening like happened in Oklahoma.

Not to sound petty, but I was planning to buy a new harp from a lady that lives about seven hours away. We were supposed to meet up halfway on Thursday. I just realized that she lives in Moore, Oklahoma. I hope the lady (and her harp!) are ok.

Every time I hear the word “Oklahoma” I can’t help but think of one of the most awesome scenes in movie history. Gather your children around to watch one of our family’s most beloved movie clips (Steve Martin has never been funnier than in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels).

 

 

Picking strawberries in an annual tradition in our family. It’s one of my favorite things to do not only because it makes me feel like a farmer, but I just flat out love strawberries. There’s a u-pick farm near Austin that we go to every Spring. Well, “near” meaning an hour away in a lackluster town called Marble Falls. We travel to Sweet Berry Farm to pick strawberries first thing in the morning, then head over afterwards to Peete Mesquite, a really excellent hole-in-the-wall BBQ joint (Texas has a jillion of those).

Yes, the boys picked strawberries too. But they don’t like to stick near their mom. Especially when there are pet goats nearby.

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We aim to pick about 14 lbs of berries. I’m an avid jam-maker and this will make between 25-30 jars of jam. That’s enough to last us all year.

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The kids are put to good use. Ada’s especially good at hulling strawberries.

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It takes me about a million years to chop everything up and make the jam, but eventually I get these jewels all ready to be put up in the pantry. I don’t do freezer jam for a few reasons: it’s kind of watery and I don’t care for the texture; freezer space is at a premium in my house. I can’t waste the square footage on jam!; the preparedness person in me insists on something self-stable.

 

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These jars are made by a German company called Weck. They’re a little spendier than the ho-hum jars available at the grocery store but look how crazy cute they are! I’ve had these for about eight years and I’ve totally gotten my money’s worth out of them. I do a few Mason jars too, for giving away to friends/teachers. I’m not about to part with my Weck jars! You can get Weck jars from the company website here –which is the cheapest option. (I use the 1/5 litre Deco jars. If you buy Weck jars, they work a little differently than regular canning jars. You’ll need rubber gaskets instead of flat lids and and metal clips instead of screw-on rings.I happen to think Weck jars are superior to Ball or Kerr brands. And not just because they’re European!)

 

If you’ve been reading this blog for more than a couple of months you probably have heard me mention my favorite grocery store, HEB. It’s not a word, it’s initials. The founder was named Howard Edward Butt, an unfortunate name. Mister’s mother grew up in San Antonio and remembers shopping at “H.E. Butt”. I guess they got tired of all the kids tittering about the name and it was shortened at some point into H-E-B. At any rate it’s my very favorite grocery stores and they’re only in Texas. They feature lots of local products and they have good prices. When they got in touch with me a few weeks ago and asked if I’d like to try some of their Primo Picks products I was like, “heck, yeah!”  So they sent me a lovely bag full of goodies.

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Primo Picks are products (mostly local) that HEB thinks are extra good or interesting. Being lovers of sweets, my family gobbled up The Big Chip Cookies first. You know I love cookies. But not store-bought. There is no way I would eat a store-bought chocolate chip cookie. But I tried one of these and–my gosh–they were good! Like, good enough to eat a lot. Chips Ahoy wishes they were this delicious. The entire bag was gone in ten minutes. Not joking.

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The kids were also excited to try the Vintage Soda Pop cake and frosting mixes by Debbie’s. Cake mix is another one of those things that I turn my nose up at. Yes, they’re convenient but they taste so artificial. But this cake mix (made with HEB’s version of Dr. Pepper) was really yummy. Not fake-tasting at all. I would totally keep a couple of theses on my shelf for last minute desserts.

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Also big hits were the Texas Firecrackers spicy crackers (Jasper ate almost the whole bag himself) and the Better Than Good Bacon Jam. I’m not going to lie–the bacon jam freaked me out a little. I love bacon a lot; in an “eternal soul mate” kind of way. The thought of eating it in a smooshed up, semi-liquid form kind of grossed me out, though.  But I slathered some on a steak and it was great. Mister wanted to serve some with cream cheese and crackers but I kept forgetting to buy cream cheese. I bet it would taste fantastic.

I also liked the tortilla warmer. It’s the thing in the picture with the cheesy illustration of a jalapeño riding an armadillo. I wish it had a simpler illustration, like an outline of Texas or something. But it was super handy for warming up a stack of tortillas and keeping them warm. Since it’s fabric it’s a lot easier to store one of those big plastic tortilla warmers. I’ve been needing something like this for years.

I’ve seen Primo Picks all over HEB in the past but I usually pass them by. I admit that I get stuck in a rut with the food I buy. I don’t want to waste my money on food that my family might not like. Being able to try several Primo Picks was eye-opening. These are pretty great items. If you’re a fellow Texan, you might want to throw a few Primo Picks in your buggy next time you’re at HEB. Try some products and let me know what you think!

 

*HEB sent me all of these products to try. The opinions are mine.

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OK, so it’s only one girl. And it’s not exactly the dress Maria von Trapp was enivisioning. But here is sweet little Ada amongst the bluebonnets. She turns eight on Sunday and this is the dress she’ll wear to the baptism (not during the actual baptism because it’s blue and she has to wear white during the baptism itself. It’s also silk and the water would ruin it).

Now that I think about it this is a really braggy picture. Look at my beautiful daughter in her beautiful dress! Look at this lovely scenery! Isn’t Texas the best? Aren’t you super impressed that there’s a horse in the picture?

The horse isn’t ours, neither are the bluebonnets (thanks for letting us come out to your Ranch, Lisa!) I did make the dress–true–but I made it for India’s baptism and so that makes it a hand-me-down more than an heirloom. (I got Ada to wear it by telling her it matched her eyes.)

There’s a lot of weirdness surrounding posts and pictures on blogs/facebook/instagram. It’s hard to tell where information turns into bragging which turns into obnoxiousness. This is what I’m discussing over at Segullah today. Come and give me your 2¢!

Mister finally bought a Prius after thinking about it for about five years. Now he needs a new license plate. Here in Texas we have about a jillion different plate designs and I had fun looking for one. I also found out that the name Hildie is available! I should totally get a personalized plate, shouldn’t I? They’re $150 per year so I doubt I will, but I had fun trying out some designs. This one is my favorite. I do love a good cheeseburger.

 

Mister is a big Dr. Pepper fan. Me, notsomuch but this would certainly be a unique plate. In case you’re thinking that it’s a totally random license plate design, Dr. Pepper was invented in Waco, TX.

 

Of course, Texans love Jesus too. You’d better be a nice driver if you commit to this license plate. If you feel like your Jesus fish on the back of your car isn’t hardcore enough, consider this one.(Or you could just let your kind Christian behavior speak for itself.)

 

Say you’re really into NASCAR. Texas has not one, not two, but four NASCAR designs.  Why does that not surprise me.

 

And let’s not forget the hunters. If you are super into killing wild Turkeys, now you can inform everyone behind you at the stoplight. You wouldn’t want people to think you kill deer or boar or something. Make sure you let everyone know that shooting turkeys is where it’s at. And you don’t kill those tame turkeys either; only crazy wild ones. Hey, there’s is an actual federation dedicated to them! I’ll bet those are some rootin-tootin conventions.

 

This one just plain confused me. BYU is in Utah. But I can have a Texas plate with a Utah school on it? That’s like ordering a Steak Gordita at McDonalds. Weird.

 

If you have a tribal tattoo you’d probably like this plate as well. That way people know you’re a badass even though you’re driving a Corolla.

 

This design is my favorite but I have to say I was a little disconcerted with the way they split up my name:

 

Suddenly Texas is telling me they want me dead? Although I have to say I love the tagline, “Texas 4 Ever”. Did you guys watch Friday Night Lights? Did you see the show’s finale when Tim is looking over his property and says, “Texas Forever”, just like in the very first episode? Man, I was doing the ugly cry. Texas forever, indeed.

I’m about to walk out the door to JoAnn Fabrics. I shall be buying fabric and sewing a pioneer outfit for my oldest daughter for the Pioneer Trek this weekend. It’s a tradition of Mormons to recreate  a pioneer experience for the teenagers every few years. Of course starvation, death and cholera will be omitted but sunburns and blisters will certainly be on the menu. From what I can gather, handcarts will be included but, sadly, conestoga wagons and oxen will not.

The kids are supposed to dress “pioneerish” while still being practical. Boys have to wear long pants (no jeans) and button-up shirts. Girls wear ankle-length skirts and aprons–bonnets optional. Basically they look like sloppy Amish people. Shoes are expected to be sturdy and comfy. We bought hiking shoes for all three kids last month and have been making the kids wear them to break them in. India has been particularly incensed that she wear hiking shoes to school. Better than than blisters, though.

Because Texas summers are killer, we do our Trek in the winter-time, unlike most of the church kids in other parts of the country. Realism is only taken so far; We don’t want them dropping like flies. The highs this weekend should be in the low 70′s. Perfect. The kids and equipment will be taken a couple of hours away and everyone will walk around pushing carts and doing other pioneer-y things for a couple of days. The Mormon kids in Utah will often times get to travel the very same wagon paths the original Pioneers followed. But this is Texas so the kids will wander around some nice rancher’s property. If you want a visual watch the movie True Grit. It was filmed close to the ranch where they’ll be staying. (Plus True Grit is just a fantastic movie.)

Mormons have a pioneer heritage but so do a lot of other people in this country. I think everyone in the Western half of the U.S. should have to reenact some sort of migration. Maybe someone should start a tourism company that does treks over the Sierra Nevadas or maybe up the Oregon Trail. The super adventurous could even do a recreation of a winter time Donner Party expedition. It would be like those PBS shows “Texas Ranch House” or “1890 house” but shorter-term. I wonder if people would do that.

Maybe there already is such a thing? I, of course, would not do it. Instead I will make some pioneer  garb for my daughter and wave goodbye. And go to sleep in my nice Tempurpedic bed.

A couple of weeks ago one of my readers,Tiffny, pointed out that my blog has been really gross lately; weevils, lice, rats . . . Yep, I’m most definitely guilty.  It’s a strange thing when you blog; there is the group of bloggers who feel like they should present a really lovely, wonderful life because it inspires people (or maybe they’re simply insecure. Not sure how to tell the difference). Those blogs are terrifically popular and people just eat them up. I, however, tend do dislike those blogs because they make me feel inferior and terribly jealous. Even though I know those bloggers have bad things in their lives too. It just doesn’t seem like it. And I read them and start feeling the hate roil within me. I turn into a massive green-eyed monster. I’m not exaggerating.

And then there is the group of bloggers, like me, who say “don’t feel bad about the crap in your life! Look at the crap in my life and let’s feel bad together!”   I have always, since I was a child, felt the need to be myself. If some people don’t like it, it doesn’t bother me at all. So this blog is one part, “look at my crummy life”. It’s also one part, “some of my life might be crappy, but I also happen to know how to do a lot of stuff too.”

The hard part of blogging for me is finding out how to balance the nice things and the things I know how to do (without seeming like a big, braggy know-it-all) with all of the unpleasantries and funny stuff.

Obviously, I’ve been slipping in the pleasant things as Tiffny pointed out. One of the biggest reasons is that I still don’t have a computer with Photoshop and I’ll be darned if I’m going to put unretouched pictures up on my blog! But I’ll just have to figure something out. I’ve got about a dozen tutorials that have been sitting around waiting to be edited. I want to be honest, but I don’t want my stuff to look crappy! I do have a teensy bit of self-respect.

To make up for all the ugliness I’ll put up a bunch of pictures from Instagram. I forget that not everybody looks at that. Here are lots of nice and pleasant pictures to see you through until I do some nice posts again (which will not happen until Christmas because I am swamped like you wouldn’t believe.)

Here’s some stuff I made:

Arabella’s Halloween Costume (some sort of Marie-Antoinette type thing)

About a million rolls for Thanksgiving. I couldn’t get them all in one picture. They got eaten in the first round of Thanksgiving, even though there were only 14 people at dinner.

And several pies: two Apple, one Lemon Truffle, and a Tin Roof. The crust this year was a new recipe that I made with half butter and half leaf lard (not the gross grocery store kind of lard) and it was so fantastic it almost made my brain explode.  Here’s my ode to Texas:

I also crocheted a monkey for my friend’s baby. I’m not so great at crocheting. The ear was particularly difficult. My brilliantly crafty friend, Cheryl, helped me crochet one ear and then I did the other all by myself. Guess which one I made!

Oh whoops! I wasn’t supposed to show you anything goofy! Here’e the monkey all finished (I only had to make eight ears before I figured it out!) I tried to make it to match the nursery which was “Dr. Seuss colors”.

The knitting is going lots better. I’ve been working on a scarf for the last couple months. It’s supposed to be the sort of thing that takes two nights to do, but when it’s been 80º for months there’s not quite the motivation to get a scarf finished. But it has been lovely sitting on the front porch knitting in the warm afternoon sun.

You see, there have been some lovely and productive things happening in my life. It just seems like I live in a vile house of pestilence and filth. Now if you’ll excuse me I have a toilet to unclog and eight more batches of gingerbread to bake.

 

I pretty much vanished for the last couple of weeks. Partly due to relatives in town (we know who loves us by how often they visit. Hint, hint, relatives.) Partly due to being the Relief Society President when half the ward decides to move at the exact moment the other half goes on vacation. I know you guys really love it when I complain about how busy I am and thus how exhausted I am. But I will spare you the details. Here are the highlights of the last two weeks:

My mom moved back to Utah after living here in Austin for two years. People always ask what it’s like having my mother live close by since she is rather . . . high maintenance. It  is a million times easier than having her come and stay with me for two or three weeks. When she stays with me for a long amount of time there are invariably fights; she and I, she and Mister and sadly Mister and I as well. There is stress involved for all parties (well, probably my mom isn’t stressed). She likes to have things just so and just so is always something very strange. Like half-drunk giant glasses of cocoa sitting around all day. Said cocoa must be drunk through a straw. And not just any straw. It must be a really fat straw that is also somewhat translucent so that she can see the cocoa going up. Not sure why, but that’s how it is. No doubt my mother will answer this question in her blog reply.

There is also her bizarre schedule of staying up late, sleeping in and various naps. Our family doesn’t really work that way and it gets complicated when she visits. But when she lives in her own place nearby she can sleep whenever she wants, leave strange beverages sitting on her counters and it makes no difference to us. She is one of those people who finds plenty to entertain herself and doesn’t come over all the time. She’ll drop by for dinner, have a nice time and go home. It’s lovely for all of us. So it makes me sad that we won’t be getting pleasant mini-doses of her any more. Instead she wanted to be near my sister in Utah who, with three small children, is in the part of her life when she really needs grandma Boppie around.

We spend last week packing boxes, throwing away as much of her junk prized possessions as we could get away with and loading up her moving van. She and my sister waved goodbye on Saturday morning and pulled in to Utah County last night.

Also, I spent days cleaning and organizing my house. If you have out-of-town guests and clean your entire house, except for one small part, that is the part that they will invariably see. So I cleaned everything including my huge messy closet. Here’s the flip side of that rule, though: if you clean something super well, nobody will see it.  I cleaned my closet and bathroom within an inch of their lives. And nobody ever went in there. But at least they’re still clean. I’ve been trying to stay on top of it and keep the rooms from turning into the trash barge of my house. They’re my favorite place to throw things when I have to do a stash and dash because company is coming.

My husband’s brother, his wife and their teenage daughter came from Portland for an entire week and we ate like pigs and did fun touristy stuff and it was great. They had to sleep in the boy’s bunk beds but it’s a lot nicer than making them stay in the guest room and share one lousy full-sized bed.

Probably the most exciting news around here is that it has rained! A lot! And often!  But because this is Texas it rains like crazy for a little while, the rain goes away and it’s sunny and warm. And then the next day it’s sunny and warm for a couple of hours, a storm rolls in and then it’s sunny and warm again. It’s really a lovely way to have rainy weather. None of those days of dreary, cold weather like in Oregon. Our relatives were very impressed.

A few days ago I went to a book signing by Alexandra Fuller whose books I recommended here a while back. In the tiny picture on her books she looks very pretty. But most female authors look relatively pretty. That’s kind of the point, I guess. Alexandra Fuller was, in real life, drop dead gorgeous. Model gorgeous. She’s also terribly clever and skinny so I felt utterly out of my league and didn’t say a single word to her as she signed my book.  I very rarely get tongue-tied, although I did ask if I could take a picture with her (I especially like the way my arms are twice the size of hers.)

 

AFuller and me

Also, my laptop is still broken. Mister has taken pity on me and given me a real computer with an actual monitor. It’s pretty lame. Laptops are way better. I hate being on a computer where I am trapped in one place. Due to my computer situation and all the other stuff I’ve done, I have read zero blogs. I feel really bad about this. So if I haven’t commented on your blog, I’m sorry. One day I will get my life back.

Number one news story: It’s hot in most of America. Good thing air conditioning was invented. I realize that a lot of people are without power and that it’s really sweltering. But up until about fifty years ago, that would have been the norm. Not only would it have been 90+ degrees, you would have been wearing a corset and a few layers of clothing too. Now that would be horrible!

Not to seem unsympathetic but in Austin we had 90 days of temps over 100º last year. And no rain storms to help us out a little.  But it’s Texas so we just shrug our shoulders and head out to the pool. One morning last summer we went to the outdoor history farm/museum. (You can’t just quit doing stuff when it gets hot. You simply get used to having sweat roll down into your butt crack.) There was an exhibit of photos featuring the family on that very farm during the turn of the last century, dressed in full Victorian regalia. “Oh man, it would have been awful wearing so much clothing in this weather, ” I lamented. A lady standing next to me (wearing tiny shorts and a tank top) piped up, “Oh, it wouldn’t have been that bad. The chemises they wore under their clothing got wet with sweat which kept them cool.”

I just looked at the lady. I did not slap her or tell her she is an idiot.

Because I am Mormon I wear a chemise under my clothes all day every day and, sweaty or not, it does not keep me cool. Nope. Not at all.

But I’m just happy because I don’t live in Arizona where it’s 110º. Although people always say it’s not so bad because it’s a dry heat. Whatever. 110º is hot!

I also don’t live in the Middle East and have to wear a burqua. But if I did, I would for sure be wearing a bathing suit under it.

Let’s all just agree that air conditioning is a glorious miracle.

Last week amid the birthdays and lice and Easter preparations, Mister and I escaped to the Round Top Antiques Fair. I always write about this because it’s so completely great; when are you guys going to believe me and go yourselves? Who cares that it’s the middle of nowhere in Texas? Tori Spelling made it out last year! You should too!

This time my main shopping trip was to Marburger Farm–which is one small part of Round Top. I think Marburger has the best items and displays, hand-down. Keep in mind that this takes place in the middle of a 40-acre field. There are several giant tents set up, but there is no paving or air con. Despite this the sellers do a fantastic job making their booths look gorgeous. This is especially amazing considering how many of them come from around the country.

Marburger also has wifi and nice Kohler bath trailers (with actual toilets!) so it’s not completely primitive. These were some of my favorite things that I came across. (Not nearly as kitschy and oddball as the flea marketish parts of Round Top.)

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I thought the shells were nice but an actual zebra head? That’s kind of a niche market.

 

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPhone AppOf course.

Because who hasn’t thought, “you know what this mantel needs? A turtle shell.”
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Have you ever seen so much Ironstone in one place? I haven’t. I noticed a really pretty cake stand that I thought I might splurge on until I took a look at the price tag.

 

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$1600 for a cake stand??? For that price I expect it to be painted with the tears of 18th Century Chinese concubines. I think I’ll stick with the ceramic version from Pier One that costs 97% less.

Also pretty but way too expensive:

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Antique napkin rings. At between $150-$200 each this lady has sunk a lot of money into inventory. And think of all the polishing! Oy! I don’t even own any cloth napkins. I think that officially makes me tacky.

So no, I didn’t buy much at my trip to Round Top. But let me tell you, it is the best window shopping on Earth. So mark your calendars; the next fair will be October 3-7.

To find out more about Round Top, you can read my post from the last fair here.